“A relationship is like a china cup, once broken can be mended, but a crack is always there.”
I read this when I was a teenager, an age when you collect quotes and poems, with a feeling of butterflies in your stomach. I still remember it like yesterday because it didn’t make sense to me then, but it does now.
Broken hearts may be easy to mend, but broken marriages leave a scar on the heart and the soul. A bad marriage of years going array is different and has a lot of reasons. But a new marriage going stale or snapped in the bud, is a heart wrenching thing, with no fault whatsoever of the victim.
Recently one of my friend’s cousin’s two year old marriage was broken. It was sad and shocking because the girl left him for another girl. No offence to anyone, but it was shocking as she behaved perfectly normal with her husband and even lamented many-a-times that she couldn’t conceive. The boy blames her for using him to come out of the ‘closet’ and the girl is beyond distance to comment on this. He is looking out for a girl to remarry, but is so cautious that he doesn’t trust any girl easily now.
Another of my cousin’s friend had a divorce because he was not interested in worldly affairs of the heart or body! Simply put, he married so his mom could have a daughter-in-law. He was into spiritual and religious activities and was not interested in a married life. The girl bore with this for a year and didn’t even let her parents know. But ultimately, when the boy couldn’t bear with the girl’s desires of the body and heart, he took a decision, a right decision I would say, to tell his parents about it. The girl’s parents are thinking of a remarriage for her, but at the back of their mind, there is always a doubt about their daughter’s future.
One of my first cousin’s marriage was broken before it even took place. After the engagement, my cousin was back to the US from India, as they were to be married after 3 months, on the request of the girl’s parents. They spoke on the phone, exchanged emails and worse, he knew a bachelor’s party too. It was then, in the course of their discussion, my cousin asked for her passport details so he could arrange a visa for her to come to the US after marriage. It was then that she told him the truth that she loves someone else and now her parents have agreed to it which they never did before. My uncle had sent out the invitation cards too and it was an embarrassment for everyone, and sad too, that the wedding didn’t take place.
I know a girl who got married, flew to the US and eloped with her boyfriend residing in the US. The boy was grief-stricken and embarrassed too. He was left trying to answer his parents’ and relatives and friends’ questions, while the girl was being wooed by her boyfriend. I also know a girl, who got married, came to the US and found out that the husband is already married to an American. He was a pervert to even think that he could live with both of them under the same roof and enjoy. But the girl ran back home to her parents. She is happy now though single, staying with her brother’s family. I know, we all must have watched movies with these plots, but believe me, I have seen them happening around me.
Why does a marriage break? There may be numerous reasons. But, the actual facts being that people don’t enquire enough about the other party before they get their girl married or fix their marriage. And the main glaring reason is also that parents don’t know much about their own children before they decide to get them married. The kids don’t feel close enough to the parents to tell them their secrets, because some parents are too strict to be friends with the kids. Who is to blame? Nobody? Or both?!!
Wake up papa and mamma; talk to your kid first, marriage comes later!
Wake up kiddos, talk to your parents first, before you walk out on them!
Marriage is a tough thing to keep strong. You can’t just go through the motions any more and expect it to all get better in 20 years. In today’s world, we have so many options and some people tend to take the world up on them before considering the damage that it can do to others.